


What we would do for though we profess to love.

by Neko_Airie



Series: Rarities come in Handy [25]
Category: The Musketeers (2014)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Daemons, M/M, talk of assisted suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-15
Updated: 2015-01-15
Packaged: 2018-03-07 15:16:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,632
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3176677
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Neko_Airie/pseuds/Neko_Airie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The streets are hot and humid but when the four of them come upon a chilling and horrid scene that drags up memories they would prefer to leave behind there comes a talk that many do not wish to have.</p>
            </blockquote>





	What we would do for though we profess to love.

**Author's Note:**

> There has been a long gap and I'm so sorry, real life was a bugger for the past few months. I am trying to get back to writing again
> 
> On another note. I have an awesome bit of cover work that has been done for me but the wonderful Selene467 check out the link
> 
> http://archiveofourown.org/works/3176064
> 
>  
> 
> Still looking for anyone interested in podficing this series
> 
> Not my best work and I will probably be re-writting this as I was sick while writing it but I just had to.

It was a typical summers day in the fence harbour quarter, meaning hot, humid and smelly. Fish looked out at doc workers from merchants stands with dead baked eyes. The fishermen and workers themselves didn’t seem to be doing much better as they hauled cargo from ship to cart. The sound of worn shoes scrapping over sticky and stained cobbles just added to dismal and dreary feel of the day.

Porthos sniffed to deal with an itch in his nose and instantly regretted it, he made a face that could only be described at nausea and disgust mixed. “What ever you do, don’t breath through your nose.” He said in choked voice to the other three. Aramis let out a snort and then nodded when he accidentally did. “No, Porthos is right, just don’t.” He coughed raising a hand to put over his mouth as though it was going to make a difference. Athos just cocked and eyebrow and carried on pushing his way through the crowded docks heading towards the very outskirts of the docks in the hope that it would smell less and have less crowded taverns. d’Artangan seemed to be the only one not affected by the stench of the docks, Porthos gave him an accusing stare. “What’s your secret man?” He asked as if d’Artangan was going to come out with some great eastern wisdom. “I worked on a farm, heck this is nothing compared to a summers day in the stables. Sweat, horse, horse dung. Really fish ain’t that bad.” He said following Athos, said musketeer just smirked and tried not to look too smug. Porthos groaned realising that he wasn’t getting any help from the youngest of their group. He looked down at Anumpama seeing if she had any wisdom, she just shrugged her massive shoulders and carried on walking next to d’Artangan. “Adelynn why do we stay with these people?” He asked looking for a little sympathy. Evette stuck her head up from the her satchel and found Porthos with her keen eyes. “Cause you love us.” She chattered helpfully. Adelynn just barked in agreement and carried on walking. On hot days like this she tended to keep to more animal characteristics, expended less energy and was kinda fun. Aramis laughed and scratched behind Evettes ear.

The group carried on walking through the docks, the buildings moved passed them and soon they were on the outskirts of the docks and the air cleared a little. Porthos took a deep breath of the air and sighed. “Thats better.” he breathed. The allies were getting darker and tighter, no need to get carriages through. Adelynn was walking with her head low sniffing the ground as she walked, she came to an ally that was shrouded in shadows. She paused when and odd scent hit her nose, she stuck her head into the entrance of the ally and whimpered. Porthos looked down at her and followed her gaze and suck his head into the entrance of the ally, he gasped. “Guys…” He said quietly and headed further into the entrance of the ally. Athos followed instinctively stepping in front of d’Artangan.

The ally was dark and wet, smelling of something no one would want to consciously identify. Porthos moved deeper followed by Adelynn and knelt beside a stack of crates that were blocking the rest of the ally. He bit his lips and let his eyes adjust to the darkness of ally. Aramis followed him in and let Evette out of her pouch so she could also see. Athos was next to enter the cramped space, Bijou hopping on the dark crates. “What is it?” He questioned wearily, hand balanced on the hilt of his sword ready for anything that may happen. Porthos waves his hand to quiet the elder male. Huddled on the wet and smelly cobbles, dressed in only rags that may have once been regal and beautiful clothes is a man, if can even be called that any more. He is gaunt and emaciated although he is not begging. Just huddled. Porthos inches forwards, he reaches out and shakes the mans shoulder gently and speaks to him. “Hey Mate… you hear me?” He questions. The man gives no reply and just continues to stare absently towards the wall on the other side of the ally. Porthos tries again and gets the same response. Aramis moves forwards again and takes up the inspection of the man. “He’s got a pulse so…” He trails of as his eyes analyse the way that the man was. He notices this light shake and rock that seems to have taken over his body along with the odd movement to his hands. “He’s stroking his daemon.” Athos fills in. Aramis mind clicks over and he finally comes the conclusion. “He’s got no daemon.” He breathes quietly and Evette presses her self close to Aramis with a quiet whimper. At the mention of the word daemon the mans rocking increased and his eyes became erratic and panicked. “Gone. Fell. Gone. Gone” His voice was broken, like he had screamed for hours on end.

Porthos swallows and he draws his hand back and wraps it in the long dark fur of Adelynns coat and breathed deeply. His mind seemed to jump back to the horrid experience of what he had saw when Anu had been taken from d’Artanagan. He remembered the lost look as the boy had offered up the only clump of fur he had managed to save of her. He chewed on the inside of his cheek as he remembered the pain he had seen in the poor boys eyes. The sick feeling as he thought about the fact that this could have been the way that d’Artangan had ended up. Comatose and voice horse and broken from screaming.

Aramis could only think of the screams, the screams of d’Artangans loss. He remembered watching d’Artangan as he used the last of his strength to beg to get her back.

_“I want her.” Athos tried to reach out to him but d’Artangan lashed out wild and uncontrolled. He began to scream, voice shrill and deafening. Fists pounding against Athos chest. “I WANT HER BACK. GIVER HER BACK.” Athos tried and tried to constrain the lashing and punching as he began to cry as well._

Aramis crossed himself and muttered a prayer under his breath, a prayer of pity and thanks. Thanks that d’Artangan had stayed with them, that he had been able to bond again with Anu and not be subjected to pain and emptiness of knowing that he had failed his daemon. Pity for the misfortune and pain that had lead to this mans state.

Athos was frozen in horror, watching and trying to to superimpose the image of d’Artangan onto the body of the man. His hands were twitching and shaking. His breath shaking and rattling in and out of his lungs. He was suddenly aware of his own memory and what he had nearly done.

_Was this d’Artangans life now, this empty shell that shook at the touch of others. Would it have been kinder to let end his pain, this endless aching pain. How long would he last before he just went to sleep and didn’t wake up. “Athos?” Aramis voice startled him and he jumped slightly. Athos craned his neck to look at him. “What are you thinking about?” Aramis asked this and he didn’t know what to say. “Truth?” Athos questioned and Aramis nodded. “Whether or not I should give him an end to his pain. How can we justify letting him live like this, He wouldn’t live, he would survive and that would be it.” Aramis eyes widened and Evette whimpered._

One thing that struck him. He was right, there was nothing worse than this life. Nothing worse than seeing someone like this, but knowing that there was someone you love that had been in this position. That is was simply luck or maybe fate that they hadn’t.

It was Porthos that came to the present first, he stood realising that there was little he could do, or any of them could do. He looked at the other pair, Aramis still praying, knelt head low and lips moving wordlessly, Athos staring as his mind filled with memories that he would rather had stayed buried and hidden. His eyes then alighted on the fourth member of their group. d’Artangan, the boy was stood just behind the three of them staring and shaking, eyes wet with unshed tears and haunted by the experience of having Anu torn from him. Porthos reached out and shook both Athos and Aramis from their stupors, he then gestured softly to the pale figure of d’Artangan. Aramis gasped and started to move forwards, Evette heading towards Anumpama, the large tiger had backed away from the ally and was stood across the street trying not to remember her fear and her pain. Athos jumped a little but soon came around to Porthos train of thought, Bijou swooped down to Anu and landed gracefully and gently on her back. She started to rub her beak over Anu’s ears and nibbled soothingly.

Athos moved in front of d’Artangan, blocking his view of the man and started to rub the too cool shoulders of his soul bonded. “d’Art, Darling. Look at me.” He encourage soothingly. He strokes over the boys cheeks, maybe trying to encourage the tears to fall or maybe just trying to get eye contact. Anything would be better than this vacant fear that seems to have taken over where d’Artangans consciousness normally was. Athos shook his head when there was little recognition. “We need to find a tavern or a lodge. Somewhere warm and safe.” Porthos said as he looked on at the pair. Aramis nodded and started to move forwards. He scanned the street with sharp eyes and gave a small semi-triumphal sigh. “There, on the corner of the street. An Inn.” It looked expensive but they needed somewhere close.

Athos wrapped an arm around d’Artangan and started to force the boy to walk forwards back towards the red light of the sunset covered street. As the sun touched d’Artangans face the boy seemed to return a little to himself and take up control of his body. “Would that have been me?” He asked quietly after a few moments. Athos pauses and swallows. He knows the boy needs to hear the truth. “Yes….no…” He answers both, this causes d’Artangan to blink and look at him with confusion. “Lets get to the Inn, we can talk more there. You need a drink and some food. Your still shaking.” He expresses quietly, tonight was not going to be easy.

The distance to the Inn is short, no more than a hundred yards but it seems to take an eternity for d’Artangan. He was trying to imagine what it would be like to be alone, without Anu by his side, with out his soul. He retches and clasps hard onto Athos hand. The man steadies him. “Try not to think about it. She’s here, right here” Athos voice is quiet and calming as he guesses what d’Artangan is thinking. What they have all thought over the last half hour.

They enter the Inn, one of the more higher end for dignitaries arriving of ships and such. The patroness gives them a stern look then notices the state that d’Artangan is in and her eyes soften a little. “A room please, with a double bed if possible.” Athos asks politely, they can’t afford two rooms, not with the money that have on them at that moment.. Although Athos doubted that any of the them wanted to be far from daemon or brother in arms that night, this had hit home hard. He places a pouch of gold on the counter. The Patroness nods and selects a key from the back of the counter and hands it to them. “It’s room and food, just call down when you ready to eat.” She pauses and looks over at d’Artangan. “I’ll send up a measure of brandy, on the house. It looks like the young one needs it” Athos thanks her and leads the way with d’Artangan up the nice stairs towards the room given to them.

Athos settles d’Artangan on the bed and removes what outer clothes he could, leathers and weapons. Until all the boy is wearing it his shirt and breeches. Anumpama hopes up beside her human and shuffles under him creating a living bolster cushion. “I’m here d’Art, I’m not going to leave you.” She whispers and nuzzles into his hand until he smiles and starts to scratch behind her ears. Athos breathes a small sigh of relief and Bijou flies to the pair and settles on d’Artangans shoulder. Porthos and Aramis divest themselves of weapons and leathers as well and settle themselves into a sofa by the fire. Despite the heat of the day the night seemed to be as could as the of winter. Their daemons were happy to just curl up with them and be touched by their humans, it was all they wanted in the moment was confirmation that they were not separated, would not feel that pain.

Athos sat on the bed next to d’Artangan and gently wrapped his arms around him. “I wanted to tell you the truth…” He murmured, unsure of how this would play out. d’Artangan looked at him and swallowed. “What do you mean?” He asked worried. Athos smiles sadly and plays with a lock of dark hair on d’Artangans cheeks. “When Anu was taken from you, you became like that man was. It happened so quickly. You screamed and begged me to get her back but then you just went quiet.” he paused and took a breath. “I was so scared seeing you like that. When you asked me earlier, weather or not you would become like that I said yes and no because…. because I couldn’t see you like that and I asked myself if I should kill you. Take away your pain and hurt because you would not want to live like that.”

The silence that over took the room was a vacuum that sucked everything into it. Athos stared at d’Artangan and d’Artangan stared back. It seemed to go on for an age before it was broken by a soft smile from d’Artangan. “You would have done what was best.” He murmured. “If Anu was taken from me I would be like that. I would not be a musketeer, I would not be d’Artangan. I would be a burden that needed care constantly” He reached out and took Athos hand in his own. “I don’t want to live like that. I know how it would hurt you to kill me but you would do it cause you love me.” He murmured. It was almost a question. “I would because I loved you and it would hurt me everyday to know that I was letting you suffer.” He replied.

d’Artangan nodded and pressed his face into the warm chest of Athos and let a few tears fall before exhaustion took him. Athos cradled him and carfully pulled blankets up over the pair of them. He looked to the other pair and saw that they had also fallen asleep. He smiled to himself, days like this were the most trying but he alway felt like he would get through them, with d’Artangan at his side and Aramis and Porthos at his back.

That night when nightmares surfaced, violent and with out warning, Athos held d’Artangan through them, assured him that they were only nightmares that would be gone in the morning and promising him that he would not let him suffer like that.


End file.
